Will it have a Don't ask Don't tell policy against the straights?

More seriously, I fear that a military and a police force will be needed. Islam and Christianity hold some similar view on some points, Homosexuality being one.
Hatred and Bigotry are part and parcel of the human condition. Its not going to vanish once gays move away. In fact it will grow and fester once we do establish a nation apart.
When I attended a Gay Pride Fest in San Francisco I over heard one person telling another "We should drop a bomb in the middle of that and get rid of all those fags in one blow."
This mentality is thought by many, fortunately few actually carry forth these plans. Either because they are weak or do not have the means to accomplish these things. It is thought and devoutly wished, and we can assume that once there is a Independent, declared Gay Nation that it will suddenly be the target of so much hatred that those who can attack will take their punches.
Of course one can delay the need for a military if one plays their cards discreetly. Going back to my thread on a floating society. Start off as a corporation a business which just happens (by accident of course) to have gay investors and just happens to have a habit of attracting gay workers - all accidental, of course all kept quiet and not really a problem.
If that corporation happens to be located in a isolated place where it is not feasible for workers to commute, then it would naturally grow a town around it. If the majority of its citizens happen to be design oriented, oh well coincidences happen besides these are workers for the corporation not a movement not a "threat". If there is a need to promote an initial influx of "workers" then by all means carry forth a whisper campaign - a suggestion that X Corporation is very, very gay friendly and tends to hire gays over straights but not as an official policy.
As the corporation and its attending town and other facilities grows there will be a growing need for internal security. If that corporation produces a product that is relatively easy for thieves to steal then the need for security increases. Going back to the floating society of my previous thread, the main industry would be fish farming, that alone would require boats and vessels. Not only for shipping to and from the mainland, but also for patrolling and protecting the farms from natural predators and of course pirates.
Pirating is still a very real problem in the open ocean. Some of the pirate operations are pretty technologically advanced - a corporation with a vested interest to protect would naturally meet such a threat with excessive advanced technology in return. Not as a military threat but as a security precaution guarding not only company assets but company personnel as well i.e. the factory/farm. the town and the shipping of cargo to and from the mainland.
Open international waters are not protected. If you feel that the belief in pirates is not strong enough to explain why the corporation needs gun boats and sophisticated sonars and what not to flush out potential enemies and stop them dead in their tracks then you have to create the illusion that there is a serious threat that must be addressed.
To be blunt if there isn't a need for security then you manufacture one. Governments manufacture needs all of the time. I think we can all think of instances where wars, police actions etc are based upon staged events opening the doors for governments to make policies, departments, laws to increase security.
Generate a reasonable need for excessive force, generate the belief that a security force armed to the teeth is necessary, not a threat to others, but a form of protection from an enemy. In the age of terrorism one could easily use that - plant a bomb someplace and blame Islam. I think it is safe to assume that somebody somewhere has already used the terrorists to their advantage somewhere.
No need to target a populated place, target a secondary key facility of production one that could potentially cripple operations but harm no one. Who can blame Corporation X from suddenly investing in a security force that has armed cannon placements, a virtual navy, and air force patrolling and at ready to defend against any other potential attacks?
The USA was established as colonies well before the Declaration of Independence was Served to England. Although we can safely assume that the first pilgrims had a notion of striking out on their own, once they established themselves, once an economy, military and populace was installed. England suspected such behavior and passed laws limiting what the colonies could and could not do and produce to generate a false dependence on the crown. Thus it took so long for the USA to reach the point where Independence was possible to declare, although the pilgrims left the Old world for the New for freedoms and to escape persecution.
We are looking at a repeat of history here, we have a people who are seeking freedom from oppression and persecution. They can not all gather together on a couple of acres and say "We are Free" they will have to be sneaky about it, they will have to establish a base of operations under false pretenses, they will have to move many pieces and pawns on the board setting themselves up to where there is least risk of failure when they proudly announce their independence.
The Goal is to reach a point where independence is possible, to reach that goal may require finesse and treachery. Considering the enemies, Religion, right wing conservatism, homophobia some concessions will have to be made at first to establish the base of operations, to have what is needed in place when independence is declared.
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As for Women in the Military. You bet they should be there, in equal numbers to the men. Women are territorial creatures, more so than men in many ways. Who cares if they are menstruating? Seriously women are ceo's, doctors and a lot of other things and the cycle of life doesn't hinder them.
I would be a bit more careful facing a platoon of menstruating dikes as a male, come on women who do not like men, on pms with guns - that is a scary thought. Not so much a joke either but a serious thing to consider.
Also consider that many of the enemies to the Gay Nation will be patriarchal in nature. Islam does not allow women to be anything more than possessions to be owned by men. Men do the fighting and they are ingrained to accept women in a way that the western world sees as barbaric. Facing a military of women would have some psychological advantages - if a defeat in battle takes place that can have severe moral consequences for those kind of men.
Further if you are seriously wanting a "Free and equal" Nation that tolerates gays then you must extend that equality to all front to the extreme. We gays should be keenly aware of false equality and how it affects a people and us as individuals. To turn around and be just as abusive to any minority in our Gay Nation will doom us to complete and utter failure and will open the doors for internal revolution and resistance.