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Karnickel:
Reposting from another place:

RAINING MONEY
by Pu Song Ling (translated by John Minford)

There was a certain gentleman of Binzhou who was reading in his study one day when he heard a knock at the door. He opened the door and beheld a white-haired old man of a most antique appearance. He invited him in and asked his name.

‘My name is Hu Yangzhen - Fox the Taoist Adept,’ answered the old man. ‘In truth I am a fox-spirit. I have heard of you as a gentleman of great erudition and refinement, and would like to make your acquaintance.’

Now this Binzhou gentleman was by temperament an open-minded sort of person, and quite happy to accept the old man for what he was. He soon entered into a lengthy conversation with him about matters ancient and modern, in the course of which his guest showed himself to be extraordinarily learned and eloquent, expressing himself most gracefully and expounding the classics with unusual insight. The gentleman was hugely impressed, and from that day forward he regularly invited the old man to stay for long periods of time.

During one of these visits, he pleaded confidentially with him. ‘You and I are such good friends now. Look at the poverty that surrounds me. I know it would be the easiest thing in the world for you to come by some money. Won’t you help me out?’

The old man fell silent for a while, appearing reluctant to comply with this request. Then he smiled. ‘It would certainly be easy enough. But I shall need a dozen coins as seed.’

The gentleman provided the requisite number of coins, and the two of them adjourned to a separate room, where the old man began pacing up and down and chanting certain magical incantations. After a short while, thousands of coins came clattering down from the ceiling in a great shower, and soon they were up to their knees in a veritable flood of money. They clambered on to the top of the pile, but the coins kept pouring down and covering their ankles, filling the entire room (which was about ten feet square) to a considerable depth.
‘Satisfied yet?’ asked the old man.

‘Yes! That’s quite enough!’ cried the gentleman, whereupon the old man waved his hand and the ‘rain’ stopped. They both left the room and bolted the door from the outside. The gentleman was secretly delighted, thinking that he had suddenly become wealthy.
Some time later, he went hack to contemplate his newly gained riches, but when he opened the door the money hill had vanished. All he could see on the ground were the dozen coins he had provided as ‘seed’ money. He was deeply disappointed, and accused the old man with some animosity of having cheated him.

‘I was looking for a friend,’ replied the old man angrily, ‘someone to discuss books with, not a partner in crime! If what you want is money, then you’d better go and make friends with some petty thief! I’m afraid I cannot oblige.’
With these words, he shook his sleeves and was gone.


 ;D

Karnickel:

Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster[/color]

OPEN LETTER TO KANSAS SCHOOL BOARD:

I am writing you with much concern after having read of your hearing to decide whether the alternative theory of Intelligent Design should be taught along with the theory of Evolution. I think we can all agree that it is important for students to hear multiple viewpoints so they can choose for themselves the theory that makes the most sense to them. I am concerned, however, that students will only hear one theory of Intelligent Design.

Let us remember that there are multiple theories of Intelligent Design. I and many others around the world are of the strong belief that the universe was created by a Flying Spaghetti Monster. It was He who created all that we see and all that we feel. We feel strongly that the overwhelming scientific evidence pointing towards evolutionary processes is nothing but a coincidence, put in place by Him.

It is for this reason that I’m writing you today, to formally request that this alternative theory be taught in your schools, along with the other two theories. In fact, I will go so far as to say, if you do not agree to do this, we will be forced to proceed with legal action. I’m sure you see where we are coming from. If the Intelligent Design theory is not based on faith, but instead another scientific theory, as is claimed, then you must also allow our theory to be taught, as it is also based on science, not on faith.

Some find that hard to believe, so it may be helpful to tell you a little more about our beliefs. We have evidence that a Flying Spaghetti Monster created the universe. None of us, of course, were around to see it, but we have written accounts of it. We have several lengthy volumes explaining all details of His power. Also, you may be surprised to hear that there are over 10 million of us, and growing. We tend to be very secretive, as many people claim our beliefs are not substantiated by observable evidence. What these people don’t understand is that He built the world to make us think the earth is older than it really is. For example, a scientist may perform a carbon-dating process on an artifact. He finds that approximately 75% of the Carbon-14 has decayed by electron emission to Nitrogen-14, and infers that this artifact is approximately 10,000 years old, as the half-life of Carbon-14 appears to be 5,730 years. But what our scientist does not realize is that every time he makes a measurement, the Flying Spaghetti Monster is there changing the results with His Noodly Appendage. We have numerous texts that describe in detail how this can be possible and the reasons why He does this. He is of course invisible and can pass through normal matter with ease.

I’m sure you now realize how important it is that your students are taught this alternate theory. It is absolutely imperative that they realize that observable evidence is at the discretion of a Flying Spaghetti Monster. Furthermore, it is disrespectful to teach our beliefs without wearing His chosen outfit, which of course is full pirate regalia. I cannot stress the importance of this enough, and unfortunately cannot describe in detail why this must be done as I fear this letter is already becoming too long. The concise explanation is that He becomes angry if we don’t.

You may be interested to know that global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of Pirates since the 1800s. For your interest, I have included a graph of the approximate number of pirates versus the average global temperature over the last 200 years. As you can see, there is a statistically significant inverse relationship between pirates and global temperature.



In conclusion, thank you for taking the time to hear our views and beliefs. I hope I was able to convey the importance of teaching this theory to your students. We will of course be able to train the teachers in this alternate theory. I am eagerly awaiting your response, and hope dearly that no legal action will need to be taken. I think we can all look forward to the time when these three theories are given equal time in our science classrooms across the country, and eventually the world; One third time for Intelligent Design, one third time for Flying Spaghetti Monsterism, and one third time for logical conjecture based on overwhelming observable evidence.

Sincerely Yours,

Bobby Henderson, concerned citizen.

P.S. I have included an artistic drawing of Him creating a mountain, trees, and a midget. Remember, we are all His creatures.


Mogul:
April Fools Day

Dear Friends,

the announcement of the Summer Camp 2006 on the Farm of "Mr. Glukos Agoris" was, of course, our tribute to the April Fools Day. "Glukos Agoris (Γλυκό Αγόρι)" means "Sweet Boy", and the city of Mytilene (Μυτιλήνη) is located on the island Lesbos.  ;D ;D ;D

Next time, the camp shall be real - it souldn'd be overly difficult to find a location for camping in Greece. Should we watch out for an opportunity on Agios Efstratios?  :P

violetsandy:
What would the cost per person be?  I was just wondering if you had any ieda of the actual costs.  I know that each person would be

 responsible for their own transportation to and from the island. :E

Mogul:
Gay Homeland Foundation
Press release GHF 2006/04 VZ
01.04.2006[/color]
Summer Camp 2006
Dear Friends,

we are happy to announce that we now have a possibility to maintain a summer camp on a Greek island Agios Efstratios! Today I have arranged a contract with Mr. Glukos Agoris (Γλυκό Αγόρι) for the use of of his farm on Agios Efstratios. We can use the utilities on the farm and have to pay solely for electricity, anything else is free. Because Mr. Agoris is in his sixtees, he cannot take care of the facilities by himselfe, and lives in the city of Mytilene (Μυτιλήνη). Do not expect much comfort, the accomodation is very simple. There is a water line to his farm, but the quality is not very good, so the drinking water must be brought from the village in cans.

Agios Efstratios is an island 0f 42 km2 and some 250 inhabitants.

The farm can be used without time limits, but we of cause need some time for organisation of supply etc. If you are interested in spending your time with a group of nice people, contact us by e-mail: summercamp2006@gayhomeland.org.


1. April 2006                 


ATTACHEMENT: Maps.

Location:


The island:


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